Great. Now I have crabs.

So the other day El Chupacabra came in carrying a Tupperware container with the lid taped shut and he set it on the kitchen counter and said “Our friend gets these in his house when it rains.”

And because of the way he was acting, I thought he might have caught a leprechaun, but I peeled back the tape and was completely horrified to find that it was not a little tiny man holding a tennis bracelet for me. Instead, it was a big, fat crab.

A crab.

A pinchy-clawed, clackety-toed, beedy-eyed, throw-it-in-a-pot-of-boiling-water-and-then-sucks-its-guts-out kind of crab.

You guys…we live in the mountains. Like, 4,000 feet above sea level. Like, surrounded by volcanoes and millions of coffee plants. Like, the mountains mountains.

And every time it rains hard, which is every day, our friend gets crabs. Can you imagine?

So my husband left the crab on the counter and went of to work, and all day long I had to listen to it scratching at the plastic box, or hunkering down, getting ready to attack me every time I walked by.

At some point it occurred to me that if our friend has crabs, we probably do, too. And I was like “Great. Now I have crabs. Thank you very much Costa Rica for yet another unexpected surprise.”

*____________________*insert expected moral of the story here. (I’m tired and I’ve got other stuff to do.)

Here’s one option from El Chupacabra.


I might also suggest Acts 10 (All of it, though. Not just the stuff about unclean food).


Here is a crab recipe for Cioppino.


Here’s an old post about lobsters.


Here's a crab from Natalie Dee.

You decide.

Hey. It’s like a Choose Your Own Adventure blog. You know? Like the books? Remember those books where if you choose the wrong path you die? Well, if you choose wrong now, you’ll…. get bored…