Things are good.
Ministry stuff is going strong. Marriage is in a happy place. My teenagers aren't crying themselves to sleep at night (as far as I know). And, though we were barely able to come up with the funds to pay for our most recent round of car repairs, it worked out, and we can still eat a little, teeny, tiny bit of food each day until we get our next paycheck. So we're good.
Actually, we're really good.
Things are just clicking. Work is good. Family is good. Health is good. Finances aren't great, but they're ok, which is good. So, basically, I have zero room to complain.
You wanna know something weird? When things get good, I start to panic.
I start wondering when the goodness will come to an end, and I start to imagine all the ways that disaster could strike. And then I start saying weird things like, “I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop” and “You know, the last time things were going this well, our house was robbed”.
It's all very whiny and pessimistic. Sexy, I know.
There's some really good stuff in the Bible about what a stupid waste of time it is to worry, but my favorite passage about worry (the one I turn to when I'm acting like a moron) is in Matthew 6.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
~Yeah, the Bible.
I always think it's so remarkable that we're still worrying about the same crap, thousands of years later (except I like to replace “pagans” with “hipsters” - try it, it works). But my favorite part is at the end, where Jesus is like, “Don't worry about tomorrow. Why are you doing that? Life is hard enough without you adding to the drama.”
”Tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own”
In other words? Shit happens. And there's nothing you can do about it, so why worry?
Why do I waste time seeking the shit; looking for it, waiting for it, anticipating it - when I could, instead, be seeking God?
Things are good.
I think I'll just rest here for a minute, in His Goodness.
Tomorrow can worry about itself...
.... ..... ....
Do you do this? Do you worry about when the good is gonna give out??