Friday, June 15, 2012

Starting over again. Again.


The madness of packing, cleaning, selling, sorting, and stuffing our lives into a few fat duffle bags is well under way.


25 days. That’s it, folks.

In 25 days we start over again…again.

I find myself feeling overwhelmed, like there’s no freaking way this can all work out, and I need to be reminded that I’ve been here before. I’ve been 25 days from an international move. I’ve been 25 days from owning almost nothing. I’ve been 25 days from flying away from home in hopes of finding a new one.

Remember? I did all this five years ago.

But five years ago was different.

Five years ago, we took 6 months to sell it all, and we had a million friends to buy it all.

We literally opened our doors, cupboards, drawers, and closets to everyone we knew, plus everyone they knew, and then we held a cheerful silent auction ~accompanied by flowing booze and tasty bites~ where the people loved us madly, and wildly wrote checks in silly amounts for ridiculous things; $22.37 for a rubber spatula, $301.99 for a book on cultivating Bonsai, $1000 for a scummy fish bowl.

We were leveled by love, floored by the generosity of our friends, family, neighbors, and strangers. I cried myself to sleep that night, knowing that we were cared for and believed in by so many.

But five years ago was different.

The economy was different, our circumstances were different, and our environment was different. We were able to raise enough money in six months to start over in a foreign land, and now we’re headed home in less than one, with almost nothing…just a few clothes, a couple of dogs, and a super evil kitty. 

And I'm kinda scared. But we're moving forward, getting rid of stuff that can't come with us whenever and however we can.

Happily, we learned of some families in need and have been able to give some things away freely and easily. (If there’s one thing we learned at our silent auction, it’s that wine opens checkbooks…. No. It’s that generosity of spirit is a deeply admirable quality, one we want to fully embody. Sometimes giving things away just feels right.) Slowly but surely, we’re selling the rest of our stuff - furniture, appliances, books, games, clothes – it’s all going for pennies on the dollar. Even a penny helps when you’re starting over again, again.

In extra happy news, we unloaded our car (an epic piece of shit) for a quarter of what we paid for it, not including the gazillion dollars we dumped into it in repairs. A gazillion dollars, no lie. Even so, having it sold is a huge relief, and the little bit of change it brought to our moving fund is even better.

So that’s good…

And… um….hmmm….

*ahem*

…So….. Let's just sit here in awkward silence for a minute while I gather my balls….


Ok.

All of my vast and extensive missionary training tells me I should be asking you for help.

I hate asking for help. Truly. The part of being a missionary where you go around asking people to give you money is, like, the woooorst.

And this situation feels even uglier because I know that it’s way more exciting to help a missionary go out into the world (where there are monkeys and tarantulas and they can’t flush toilet paper) than it is to bring a missionary back to the lame, stupid, boring suburbs. I totally get that.

But. I really, truly, and honestly believe that God has been grooming my family to bring a message of Faith, Hope, and Love to North American. I really, truly, and honestly believe that we have been gifted to encourage and guide people in a deepening of Faith in the suburbs and beyond. I really, truly, and honestly believe that we are being directed back home to call bullshit on some of the bad missions practices of the U.S. Church. And I really, truly, and honestly believe that this is the most worthwhile “mission” God has ever laid upon my spirit.

And I guess I’m asking if you want to be part of that?

I’m asking, first, if you will pray for me, for El Chupacabra, and for our children as we make this insane transition? Cause we’re freaking out, y’know, a little, and we desperately need your prayer.

And I’m asking if you’ll consider helping us out along the way with a financial gift?

Ugh! Even as I feel super confident about why we’re going back and what we’re going to do, asking for help still sucks. Perhaps I need to remind myself of what I witnessed five years ago through the generosity of the people who surrounded us that night; That this is the loveliness of the Body of Christ; to care for one another in our need, to lift each other up, to give from our abundance, and to share in the journey.

I’ll admit, clicking a PayPal button is not nearly as much fun as clinking our wine glasses together and marveling over $175 for a droopy potted plant, but in this strange bloggy world of internet friendship, we must find communion in other ways. We may be vast in number and spread out across the whole world, but we're still the Body of Christ, so all that loveliness and goodness still applies. 
  
And to be sure, I want to share in your journey, too. Just tell me, tell us, how we can come alongside you…

.....

Things to pray for:

Pray that our house would be empty/available by July10th! 
Pray for a smoooooooth transition! (Cool weather for our traveling pets, seamless flights, miraculously light baggage, and a happy homecoming for our kids.) 
Pray for El Chupacabra's continued recovery from recent knee surgery!
Pray that no one loses their mind, murders anyone, or says anything terribly regrettable during the stress of the move. (This is a biggie!)

Ways to give:

There's a handy dandy PayPal button on the right hand side of my blog. ☞ 
See it? 
(If you get these posts by email, I think you have to click through to my actual blog to get to the PayPal button.)

OR...

Many, many stores offer E-gift cards, including Home Depot, Target, and Walmart , and tons of others. You just click the link, choose the card and the amount, and send it to "Steve and Jamie Wright" at theveryworstmissionary@gmail.com 

Every PENNY helps.  =) 

...Thanks for journeying with me. You are loved.