8.16.2013

This year is gonna be different! And other lies I tell us.


My kids are at school (Glory to God in Heaven) and I find myself sitting down in the morning, reveling in perfect silence (Thank you sweet baby Jesus) and sipping coffee while it's still hot (Praise the Lord).

Back-to-School is a time of big dreams in our house. It's a hope-filled, can-do, take life by the horns time of year. Back-to-school eve is just like New Years eve. But better, because the kids go to bed early and then, the next morning, they leave. We make loud resolutions about doing every last bit of homework and staying organized and putting on clean clothes and an actual truck load of deodorant every single day, no matter what. And we promise not to get distracted by chasing girls or playing video games or watching other people play video games on Youtube. (What the hell. Why is that a thing?!) We claim our victory before the battle has even begun, boldly declaring that we are gonna kick this school year squarely in the nuts. We got this!

And by we? I mean me.

It's mostly just me, shouting to my kids as they head upstairs carrying a Target bag full of socks and underwear and some bright new shoes from the Converse outlet. “THINGS ARE GONNA BE DIFFERENT THIS YEAR!”

Me, gazing across the table at their scruffy teenage faces. “We are not going to walk around with three rotten sandwiches, a half eaten doughnut, and an open bag of Cheese-Its in our backpack this year.”

Me, looking one kid straight in his ever-rolling eyes. “We are not gonna pull that crap we tried in Science last year. Because no. Never again.”

It's all me.

“We're gonna get up early!” 
“We're gonna eat better!”
"We're gonna play board games!" 
"We are going to the gym!”

Oh, the delicious hope of a new school year. I live for that first morning, when everyone is up on time, dressed so cute, teeth really brushed, on a high of nervous excitement. That day, and usually only that day, is when I get to say, “Today, we all have straight A's!” And then the angels sing in a harmony of agreement.

On the first day of school, I can't wait for them to get home. I want to hear all about everything and how it went and who's in their classes and do they like their teachers – spit it out, every detail. But I especially love the first day of school because there's no homework, and that means no fighting or lying or half-assing, and no supervising. Yay!

But this year, on the first day of school, my sophomore did have homework. He had to fill something out, or write something in, or check something off... I don't even know. I couldn't believe he had homework. Appalled, I was like, “What's the deal? We never have homework on the first day of school.”

And he shrugged his shoulders, “I had to bring my classwork home because I forgot to take a pencil.”
To. School

Awesome. 

*sigh* ... We are so screwed. 

....        .....       .....

Are you celebrating back-to-school? Or do you mourn for summer?